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  • 2005 Releases
    • Cold as Ice
    • Bingo Patties and Mango Machines
    • Burt Reynold's Facial Hair Samples
    • Go For It?
    • Steven Seagull, Richard Gecko, Dean Crane, and Russell Crow
    • Self-Titled
    • Mancold Eatery: Come Grab a Bite!
  • 2006 Releases
    • Share Moments, Share Bookmobile
    • Light Up Shoes--Play It!
    • Libra Metal of Honors: Conspiracy Volume 1
    • Love Gestures in Chloroform Juice
    • Farewell, My Mujical Beef
    • New Line Cinnamon Presents...
  • 2008+ Releases
    • Hard Granite: The Extra Perrestrial (2008)
    • 3 Faces of July (2009)
    • The Induction of Levi's Dining Doves (2009)
    • LOL w/;) (2010)
    • Bodies Found in Sector 7 (2011)
  • Compilations/Misc.
    • Freezerburn: The Best of ColdmaN2005 (2005)
    • Total Trash Cans: The Worst of ColdmaN5's Inaugural Sessions (2005)
    • Tom Salad Picks the Winners: The Best of ColdmaN5 - 2006 Edition (2006)
    • Total Toiletries: The Worst of ColdmaN5 in 2006 (2006)
    • Wedgewood Academy (2007)
    • Failure is an Option (2009)
  • Pictures
  • Social

Man, Machine, or Neither? The Shocking True Story!

I bought a machine
It's big and it's green

Keep your fingers crossed
This could go any which way but loose
And give a helping hand
Just do it any which way you can
Driftin' on high plains
Or talking to an orangutan either way
Your tombstone will read
I directed "The Bridges of Madison County"

What is he
A man or a machine?
What could he be?
The man behind the scenes?

Right between the eyes
I'll hit you like a clown in paradise
I'll hang you out to dry
Like clothes hanging on a clothesline
You've got a loaded kite
That kite will fly through the sky
And you'll see me one more time
And time will stop in my hands

I built a machine
It works half the time

How old is Clint E.
I'm guessing eighty or ninety
His health can't be real good
I'm guessing he'll have a heart attack real soon

I've got a hundred-five
On the day he dies
He will stay alive
Until the fifth of July
And his tombstone will read
Senile ramblings from beyond the grave
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